i must say, that i am having a hard time with my words here, or more, im not really wanting to say a lot of them.... which is kinda of ironic, since i am using them right now in speaking to all of you...
but im not vocalizing them, i am still silent......
i guess i don't know what to say..... there is so much happening, that i just stare and then close my eyes and then sleep and then open and just take in so much of so much.....
and then i need to process.....wheeewww......i need more time to process then to intake.... because it is all so rich and dense in what it is....
the sights.... the people, the cows in the streets the packs of dogs fighting till blood, the poo everywhere on the streets, people walking with no shoes, the flowers and the ganga river..... the children- their laughter and their smiles and their 'hello'-es and their asking for rupees, 'whats ur name'?.....their innocense their harhsness..... the intense spirituality, that people live their lives by.....it's what they live for, have all of their faith in....in life, in every nook and cranny of their life.....
the garbage, everywhere, no where to put it BUT on the street, i have been littering because there is no where else to put it BUT on the street....can you believe it? i am forced to litter.....so you learn to reuse where u can...but that's almost impossible, i wish i brought a water filter....
the toilets, squatting, using your hands to wipe, left hand.... i need to not forget.....
chai, every day, many times a day, 3 rupees here in varanasi.... it was 5 in delhi.... like under 10 cents.... i once met a man named yonatan in guatemala from israel, he said you just start off with a coffee.....now its chai....when you just don't know what else to do.....you have a chai, and some direction comes......
im having a hard time processing with another person, my tendency is to go into the music, or the movement, or nature, or my own space.....although amy is so wonderful, and all who know her know exactly what i mean....i have a hard time sharing all of my personal headspace..... but i must learn to...... it is important, and it is a lesson that i learned most clearly in central america, and the lesson is going to be extended now....
i am going to go to my first yoga session today....not exactly what i'm looking for, but its needed, i need to get that flowing here in india, as it has been so much part of my life more on than off in the last 4-5 years, and especially recently before leaving canada.... but later on today i will go to a temple where i can do yoga with a man that a really lovely young man has shown me.... this will be very special....
we are in varanasi, we've been here maybe 4 days or so?! staying in assi ghat....the end ghat i found out today, assi also means 80, there are 80 ghats that line the river ganga that flows down india, it is the holiest river....i am so honoured to be here, and to see what i have seen, and to be invited into these ceremonies that hold so much meaning to so many people....all around the country and the world.... im glad we are staying in the ghat which is representative of the end.....sometimes you need to get to the end, or the bottom, to start over again.....i like cycles..... i like ends and beginnings.....we started the journey arriving in india ON a full moon, i also started mooning (my blood flowing) that day.... so many new beginnings, many new lessons....so many new lessons....wow..... and now i have started at the end again...... totally needed....
i think this is enough for now, not as many details as i sometimes write with.....but this is what i can do for now.... i'm processing....
thank you for listening.....
with love....
sunni
but im not vocalizing them, i am still silent......
i guess i don't know what to say..... there is so much happening, that i just stare and then close my eyes and then sleep and then open and just take in so much of so much.....
and then i need to process.....wheeewww......i need more time to process then to intake.... because it is all so rich and dense in what it is....
the sights.... the people, the cows in the streets the packs of dogs fighting till blood, the poo everywhere on the streets, people walking with no shoes, the flowers and the ganga river..... the children- their laughter and their smiles and their 'hello'-es and their asking for rupees, 'whats ur name'?.....their innocense their harhsness..... the intense spirituality, that people live their lives by.....it's what they live for, have all of their faith in....in life, in every nook and cranny of their life.....
the garbage, everywhere, no where to put it BUT on the street, i have been littering because there is no where else to put it BUT on the street....can you believe it? i am forced to litter.....so you learn to reuse where u can...but that's almost impossible, i wish i brought a water filter....
the toilets, squatting, using your hands to wipe, left hand.... i need to not forget.....
chai, every day, many times a day, 3 rupees here in varanasi.... it was 5 in delhi.... like under 10 cents.... i once met a man named yonatan in guatemala from israel, he said you just start off with a coffee.....now its chai....when you just don't know what else to do.....you have a chai, and some direction comes......
im having a hard time processing with another person, my tendency is to go into the music, or the movement, or nature, or my own space.....although amy is so wonderful, and all who know her know exactly what i mean....i have a hard time sharing all of my personal headspace..... but i must learn to...... it is important, and it is a lesson that i learned most clearly in central america, and the lesson is going to be extended now....
i am going to go to my first yoga session today....not exactly what i'm looking for, but its needed, i need to get that flowing here in india, as it has been so much part of my life more on than off in the last 4-5 years, and especially recently before leaving canada.... but later on today i will go to a temple where i can do yoga with a man that a really lovely young man has shown me.... this will be very special....
we are in varanasi, we've been here maybe 4 days or so?! staying in assi ghat....the end ghat i found out today, assi also means 80, there are 80 ghats that line the river ganga that flows down india, it is the holiest river....i am so honoured to be here, and to see what i have seen, and to be invited into these ceremonies that hold so much meaning to so many people....all around the country and the world.... im glad we are staying in the ghat which is representative of the end.....sometimes you need to get to the end, or the bottom, to start over again.....i like cycles..... i like ends and beginnings.....we started the journey arriving in india ON a full moon, i also started mooning (my blood flowing) that day.... so many new beginnings, many new lessons....so many new lessons....wow..... and now i have started at the end again...... totally needed....
i think this is enough for now, not as many details as i sometimes write with.....but this is what i can do for now.... i'm processing....
thank you for listening.....
with love....
sunni
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