OCCUPY TORONTO- 40 days and 40 nights.

October 16, 2011

then you must have solutions, someone said regarding frustrations with the OCCUPATION, and have information out to the masses.

my frustration, is people criticizing it. complaining, critiquing, criticizing.. and yet not doing anything about it.

talking bad about 'no solutions', what are they doing it for, they don't even know... no information, complaint, etc

YET, they are not even going in to the Occupy site, to support or even explore it, to find out what exactly is going on... the growth that is beginning, and the importance of people, from all different backgrounds and missions, being to simply come together- with all these frustrations, at what truly is an unsustainable way of living, unsustainable way of treating the earth.

and eachother.

all the creatures and beautiful perfectional offspring and creations of the earth. the universe.

I don't have/know the solution... as if there was only one...?!?

there are so many problems, there are many solutions.

we as human Communal creatures need to support eacho other. in ALL of our processes, visions... solution- finding-intentions.

we need to share knowledges and wisdoms and fears and skills and passions... together.

we need to just be present to support healthier movement of our people.

i dont know what the solutions are...

but i sure do know that being together in solidarity... to create the 'solutions' to what everyone is saying is our 'problems' -IS the solution right now.

no separate-ness, not back-talking each other. not arresting, or harming. and not CONTINUING the problems that are already existing.

stop hurting the earth. and each other.

and BE together to BE the solutions.

'LOVE is the movement' they say.


October 18, 2011

these beautiful moments of tears...
are sacred.


October 20, 2011

This occupation... WOW.

universally connected.

what we are doing and forming is something SO special.

family, hardships, turmoil.

universal elemental challenges.

bureacracy, politics, Soul, heart, tears, INTENSITY.

i have NO idea how it will turn out.

i have NO idea how long i will stay.

or how it will change.

i am SO present right now...

and all these moments are flowing into these other moments.

i just know it feels right...

there is this ongoing 'warm and fuzzy' feelings- that even when i'm cold... i still feel right.

I feel proud... i keep saying i feel so PROUD of everyone here.... proud and honoured to be sharing in this change.

How can we ever go back... how can we ever separate from eachother.

When we work so well when we are together?

all of us... even when we're not.

we fit into eachother like we are a puzzle.

It sometimes feels really dysfunctional, like many families at times...

PATIENCE- as all the cycles do complete themselves. life, death.

and this concept of 'completion', is an ongoing process.

this flow...

it begins, it ends.

But it is most definitely just like chapters, of a book...

of a series, of a story, of a lifetime, of a century, a generation, a species, a period of time...

a moment.

NOW.

do what is right.


October 21, 2011

Silent in Solidarity- the first silent march and meditation.

Practice Silence.

i stand here in this moment... here simply reminding us all of our life, and our death. to give thanks.

i am also here to remind us to stand up for what is right, even if that is labelled 'civil disobediance'

we are all here with different voices, platforms, perspectives and feelings.

and there are over 6 billion more brothers and sisters around the world who are in solidarity with us, whether they know it or not. we share in this life energy with them.

tonight we will practice being Silent in Solidarity.

there are 2 points i want to raise here for this march:

1- at a legal rights meeting i went to in preparation for this occupation... i was reminded of one of our rights- to exercise the right to silence. It keeps us safe from dishonest people exploiting us for the words we express. legally, and also the framing of the reality by the mainstream media.

2- in actions of civil disobediance, we have seen and BEEN our brothers and sisters, gathering, maybe marching, in large groups... and be teargassed/kettled, and WORSE globally... a back up, and unifying possibility, instead of running/fleeing chaotically.... is we sit. We sit together, we ground. On the earth. we let the earth ground us. when we sit together, we assert our powers together. And we are safe together.

As we walk, SILENT IN SOLIDARITY, we can think of our 'platform', standpoint, position. Our intention.

Why are you here? personally- WHY AM I HERE? Why are WE here? Occupying?

Walk with this.

We will leave here, after a sacred blessing... a short universal blessing.

Carry your sign in your hand. Embody your passions in your heart.

There are many special activists around us who taught me 'Love is the movement'. It is.

We have so many different feelings and reasons of why we are here- and they may not always feel so loving...

but let us channel our energy into this movement.

Let us unify, in solidarity.

and let us be Silent.

Let us carry that power we are GROWING together...

and stand SILENT in support, and Solidarity.


October 23, 2011

As i sit down here to write in the SUN, outside union station toronto, waiting for the bus outta town, to a long overdue family reunion... i realize, i do not have a pen.

SO, i asked- maybe 8 people- and i received ONE.

a smile on my face...

Its amazing right now, LIFE.

'STOP SHOPPING', i want to say.

GIVE more. SMILE more.

I need to make sure i am clear of my wishes.

When you are actively part of the path you believe in... it can ALL happen.

Keeping grounded, keeps me real. and honest, and humbled.

To be more real and real every day...

not judging or clearly making a statement UNTIL i have felt and LIVED a more whole-er experience of IT, or THEM.

Care, because i do. i honestly do.

Be- with my brothers and sisters.

i'm BEcoming really familia-r with my brothers and sisters. in the occupied family.

There are many people who originally lived and shared in the park...

THEY, we, are also believers of many things, but especially in jusice.

SUNNI J, Sunni Justice... the newest name, the newest 'model' *wink

Always changing, in constant change. growing, living, loving.

REVOLUTION.

revolutionary...

I always want to be kept in check.

Occupy Toronto is keeping me extremely grounded, and in check.

Some moments, ego is present, but it is helpful to have a bit, to be able to be with everyone....

the EGO is part of the game of this cultures life.



Human Dynamics

-how are we in blanace with eachother?
-all with the same general intention... changing how we are living being in solidarity.

Selfless giving... sharing.

I have it, he needs it. I share.

When we are strong, we share.

When i am weak, i cry. I receive the medicine from my elders. I receive the true teachings from the elder- the carer of the land- of the ancestral roots of the land.

I keep myself grounded, humbled.

My rants and tangents are full of thoughts right now.

I am FULL of tidbits, of truth and reality right now. I need to process it a bit...

I need to simplify it.

...re-centering...

...re-connecting...

with the outside world, which is the same as my present 'inside' world- the park.

Clear.

Crying at any moment.

Saying something so true... talking such truths... brings me automatically to heart- full tear.... tears.

to feel and release...

i Let the sun in... meditation with the sun.



THIS IS A SPIRITUAL MOVEMENT.
-says Little Bear, a Native Elder, teacher.

a Spiritual Movement.

What is Spirit? I must understand this so that i can know what we are doing here.

Spirit- conscious... deep soul-felt. Honest... intense, energy.

Our movement- Occupation Corporate/$/Greed- is Rooted in Spirit. Balanced in Spirit.

I am nurturing that. I will work to enhance this. Support this. To GROW this.


Interlude

around this time, i was 'maxing' out as i have described it. People were asking how i was, and 'i am not sure' was what came out... i burned out a bit, i overloaded... i was so sensitively emotional, that when i finally LEFT the site, i cried so intensely, it was a matter of time it all came out... when a friend opened up her arms to me, and was able to bear my load... and i cried. and it kept going... i cried out so many diffferent things, feelings... and i went home, to warmth for a bit... i got sick... full body... and i made tea, and i took care... and RE-figured out my balance. i came back to the site for shorter periods of time, in my 4 night INTERLUDE... i could not leave altogether, but i needed to distance, to RE-understand what it ALL meant, contextually, in the context of my life, and my missions PRE-occupy, and into context of what this movement meant globally, and locally in the culture, MY culture.... and when i was ready, 4 days later... i came back. and i continue.... in a stronger, more balanced embodiment. i whole-y, holy... believe in the Occupations... in this Solidarity Movement around the world. As one of my favourite signboards says- ONE HUMAN 100% FAMILY.


October 27, 2011

what are we occupying toronto for?

SO many reasons....

what are we here saying...

so many things.

it is hard for me to process all of them, and then let it all out.

it is so intense right now.

all of it.

you know, we know... that we are harming eachother, the earth...

and yet we totally do it.

this is partially why is so difficult when people are not supporting us.

when peeople, truly our brothers and sisters... are harming the earth, us. and we do not support eachother, us, in occupy toronto, or the ACTING activists, the present selfless service in action activists... are there, marching on the streets, speaking truths out... living these true ways, of serving...

why are we not supported? ethically? morally... in action.

why?

food and money is donated... tents and blankets, tarps and coffee.

but where is your energy, your physical heart and soul... hearing the stories... feeling our struggle... and the victory and inspiration.... of the movement, of people risking the life they 'could' be living... in solidarity... FOR righteousness.

this is what it is.

do we not realize that all around the world, fellow humans and the earth are being exploited for the betterment, for the 'success' of our brothers and sisters? who have the mone and the means to choose better. choose more wisely. choose to live in a way that does not harm others... the earth.

choose SOLELY reducing, reusing, recycling, donating, fair trade, consciously constructed, created, built.... sustainable. loving...ways of life....CHOOSE this path PURELY.

if not...

how do you life with yourself?

how can i live with myself, when i am not taking care, to live as REAL as possible.

REAL, REALITY is hard work... in one way or another...

it involves more labour...

October 28, 2011- notes for LiveStream session at Media Tent

*SPIRITUAL movement- rooted, CENTRED in spiriuality
*patience with the process
*be the change you wish to see
*rawness/vulnerability/honest/open/pure/true
*fighting the right fight... when you are doing what you believe in
*sustainability- humans and the earth- all people play a role
*stock exchange/business world/modern culture... it's hard to see the humans, thus it makes exploitation of other humans easier... WE MUST SEE EACH OTHERS HUMAN-ness
*how does the occupation affect our lives?- people are quitting jobs/school, subletting homes, LIVING AND EMBODYING the change.
*nature vs. nurture- humans harming and exploting one another.
*Morals- i AM a preacher, you BET i'm gonna preach. We NEED to practice what we preach. Occupy Toronto is doing JUST that.

Hypocrite.

I am preaching equality. Yet i get frustrated and impatient.

nov 22, full night, then morning after... threat of eviction all-nighter.

earth, my body.

water, my blood.

air, my breathe

fir, my spirit.


EVICTION DAY- Nov. 23, 2011.

i ONLY UNDERSTAND now that i have lived with them all. and their complexity.

reality, a complex beauty, beautiful and complex.... complex and beautiful.

reality check.

i am touched, and honoured and brought to tears, to my emotions... in knowing how i have touched lives at occupy toronto, and how they have touched mine.

in such true raw and profound ways.

at EARTH level... at the elemental level.

WITH each other.

THROUGH it all.

PROOUD i am... so proud... of it all, of us.

it will NEVER be over... since it has now begun...

us saying... WE CAN LIVE DIFFERENTLY.

BECAUSE WE CAN.... becuase we can, truly.

and we know it... and we've seen it.

and we've felt it.

it is true.... we can live differently.

today, there were hundreds of police officers... surrounding locations, points where my lovely fellow brothers and sisters barricaded themselves in....

i did not, LOCK myself up to anything... but i believe in it.

i will do it one day... for the earth... for trees... for the health and well-being of the earth.

but i am not attached to the things on that land... even tho i love them.

i am attached to the EARTH BEING RESPECTED.

i am also atttached to PEOPLE BEING RESPECTED, and LIVES being treated equally.

i know it is possible to shift.... just subtly shift, tweak... peoples perspectives... simply by being.

being different.

BEING that different way.

that different way of being... of loving.

of being true just BEcause...

because i can be truer,more honest, more kind, more real....

and how sacred it is to do just that.


sacred.

i know what i am doing is right... because the universe keeps truly telling me that i am.

these beautiful little signs, that i am just on the right path.

and so i trust... i just do.

because i know it is right.

thank you. who know that occupy toronto is sacred. who know that it is REAL.

it is REAL as a movement towards betterment... towards change for the better... for ALL in existence.

it has different voices, different directions, issues, themes, intentions.

but it most definitely is for ALL.

it is sacred... love is the movement, and it is a SPIRITUAL movement.

and so i give thanks... sincerely.

Death Rainbow.

LIVE cycles,

Renewal,

Birth,

Growth…

Nourishment,

Life,

Water,

Fire,

Earth,

Air…

Breathe…

Breathe out.

You have to be REALISTIC about what you are actually intending.

a teacher of mine often says 'where attention goes, energy flows..'

and now i say it... sharing it as a teaching, when it emerges as truth, at that moment.

So what we put our attention into, onto... towards... we are moving in that direction... we are putting our consciousness there.

it is more likely to happen, or appear... IT being what we intend.

if i am constantly thinking of an occurence to be happening...

being arrested. finding a job. going to brasil, even though i am not sure the logistics of it.

if i am thinking about it.... scheming, imagining how it would feel... acquiring it... imagining it happening...

then clearly... my intention is actually for it to happen.

and we cannot deny when we are actually heading towards it... if our heart, is desiring it.

if we believe it to be true.

we will manifest it.

or we will at least be part of that coming into reality... since we are moving towards it.

where attention goes... energy flows.

BE REALISTIC.

emotional neutrality...

'i am sad.' he said.

'i am supposed to be emotionally neutral. not sad. but i am. i am sad.'


emotional neutrality.

needs to end.

we are emotional beings, and i honour those vulnerabilities.

we are humans who feel, and those feelings... we need to listen to.

those are our instincts, our intuitions, our morals and values.

about what are right, and wrong.

it is beautiful and important, to feel sad, and recognize that.

when it comes from a TRUE place.

of caring for others.

of recognizing that certain things are right, and wrong.

emotional neutrality, needs to end.

what are we willing to do? how far are we willing to go?

i wonder...

what ARE we truly willing to do, and how far TRULY are we willing to go...

with this 'progress', this 'development'?

because what exactly are we progressing towards? what exactly are we developing?

i sure don't think its good... i sure don't think its exactly healthy... for real.

what are we doing to the earth?


really... like really...


i just wonder what is going thru all of our minds...

i almost cannot type my feelings out... i am frustrated... i want to shut down... retreat... i cannot express how i feel, because i don't understand??

how far are we willing to go... to progress? to live a life of middle or upper class?

to have more things, and have more 'freedoms'... to spend more money...


it goes no where... we will all die?

but, there are people dying now... BECAUSE of these ideas of progress, of success, of the reasons and rationale behind living this life...

let us look back, and this is only one historic story, there are more to draw upon, in the world... and this is what i see happening now, in the city of toronto, and 'developed' cities...

during world war 2 times, in europe... men, as they were the ones who generally held positions of power in which to make decisions...

they ended up doing things, that are just horrible... to millions of people... consciously... they lived throuh all the experiences of killing so many, of following the orders of their superiors, who followed the orders of their superiors... who follow the order of his superior... and his superior was hitler... who wanted to kill so many human beings... who he believed were unworthy of being alive...

millions of people killed... millions of people part of that killing process.

how far are we willing to go? what are we willing to do...


right now, in my immediate thoughts... there are tar sands in alberta, i am picturing these HUGE black tailing ponds in my mind... i can see, and feel what they are and ARE... these tailing ponds are the leftover of the process 'they'- various corporations, with human beings working for 'them', who consciously choose, amd listen faithfully to 'their' orders... these human beings, being pawns... working for money, to shift themselves to a more 'comfortable' position in life... WHY CAN'T WE LIVE DIFFERENTLY????... these tailing ponds side by side with the Athabasca river... with creatures and earth so beautiful and alive... it is only a matter of time before it is all gone... this tar sands extraction process is so damaging to the land it is phenomenal... it is showing up in the most obvious and scary ways via rare and horrible cancers and overall UN-health...in the people who live downstream... the people who previous to these violations of the natural beatiful earth started being performed... they lived off the land, were sustained by it... eating the animals and fish and foods and medicinces of that earth... the land where their ancestors grew, and remined healthy and vibrantly alive... the land they respect, and love, and honour... as sacred life... a living earth.

we are taking this tar, this oil... and we are building more, making more, spending more, processing more, producing more... and the marketing and advertising conglomerations are, and have been as far as they can profess... are telling us that we need to do all of this... this is what it means to be developed, to progress... and to be honest, simply to sustain the life we are living now...WE here in north america that is. in 'developed' lands, 'humans of progress'. WE here in this concrete jungle we have truly created. where we purchase purchase purchase, spend spend spend... become in debt, debt, debt...

we can retrace it all back, to the presnt... it is all really clear.

what are we willing to do... to live this reality. how far are we willing to go to acqire all these THINGS?

and why can't we realize where it all is coming from... and the processes and the harm and violation being done to our fellow humans, and the EARTH more importantly to have it.

we will all die...

what kind of life are we leading?

what kinds of life am i leading?

what kinds of life am i TRULY leading...

reflect...feel and KNOW your truth... please...



what am i willing to do... how far am i willing to go...

to do what i know is NOT right... in order to say,

'wait a minute... this is not right... this is just not right... '

when do we start to recognize who is making the decisions for our framework of life here, and it ETHICALLY, MORALLY, SPIRITUALLY, ENVIRONMENTALLY, TRULY is just... not... RIGHT...?


and when do we start to recognize we are all a part of it all...

and that we can change our ways, in subtle ways, and in grander ways... and we just SHOULD be doing both... we can CHOOSE to live differently... we can... i know we can, and ALL people CAN.

we can choose to live, be, act, decide BETTER.

for the betterment of all, and the earth. and all of the beautiful creatures, and sacredness within it... sincerely.

i wish for all to let themselves shift... shift into a place where they start to be able to ask themselves these questions, and they start to have more clarity as to their answers... because their heart, and their TRUE ethical and moral mind guides then, it guides us all.


what are we willing to do? how far are we willing to go?

YOU CHOOSE.

lightning...

oh my god...

she said...

that girl outdoor... to the rain she said it...

oh my god...

i smile...

'totally...


pachemama...

i wonder, what she is saying to us...

because i feel the power, the earth energy...

i am scared of it... i feel it you know...

but then, i am often jusst humbled by her too, you know...

those beautiful days of summer sunshine...

SO hot... or so bright, or so fresh, or so cool...

but we feel it... and sometimes it feels SO good...

this life it does...

its intense... or i see it that way at least...

but its all true... u know?


oh my god' she said...

lightning.

:)

...Love is the movement...

Meditation...

what does it mean?

what it means, is very different to everyone...

as it should be...

to me, meditation is quiet, it is calm... it is trance like, and the after-feeling is bliss...

the present feeling is calm...

it is so nice when it is with others... when we can share in calming consciousness together...

when we can slow down, together.

when we can just breathe... and not wish any harm on any other moment of existence... together.

it can also be alone!

it can be alone, lying down in my bed, or sitting in a sacred room, propped against a wall, or yoga-styles- lying down, in childs pose, humbled before the earth...

it is a place and a space of solitude, of calm... of love, and freedom...

it is eyes closed, safe... it is eyes open, conscious, present...

it is so many practices, from all around the world, across history, and spirituality, and faith and religion...

and it is all the same.

meditation.

we rise again...

i just returned from the memorial gathering that has happened for the dying of jack layton... the most conscious-kind-human-loving politician of my lifetime.

and all i can say is...

we rise again.


we rise because it is just right...

we rise together, as we.

we rise for we, for each other, and we rise for the earth.

we rise for each other, for each others well being,and life and death.

we rise together, with each other... because we are all equal, and equally alive. and important.

we rise because we can... because we know it is right to stand up together, for what is right.

i will always rise, i will always stand tall, i will always rise again, and again, and again.

i know what is right. and i believe in it.

so did jack layton...

i pray that those who believe in him, in his doing what is right, for all and everyone...

will rise up.

more firmly, more clearly, and more together.

i hope we let his life and his death remind we, that we are we.

and we are one.

we are one people, we are one earth.

we are one love.

i pray, and i meditate on, and i dream, and i wish...

we rise again.

IN MY roots...

in my roots...

reggae, islands, mama africa, rastafarian TRUTHS...

the strength in growing one's locks...

in expressing beliefs so STRONGLY through ones hair... through ones expression of their body... of the extensions of their body...

i have never been able to do so...

altho i always have felt the core of me BASED in dreadlocked rasta cultures...

the freedom of connection to the ROOTS... to the earth... to faith with what is natural...

to resistence to what is UNnatural... with resistance to NORMS... that are ok sometimes, but oftentimes RESTRICTING to us human beings... from being connected to that which is real... pachamama, the earth.

morgan heritage, a reggae artist i really vibe with... says 'you don't haffi dread to be rasta'... and what that means to me is it doesn't matter whether u have dreadlocks or not... it is the philosophy, and the ACTION of what the intention of rastafarianism is...

and its righteousness, and truth... and respect... for eachother and the earth.

and THAT i believe in.

and its being thankful... and humble... and FULL joying that which we have been given...

the music, the cultures... that are ASSOCIATED with rastafarianism...

they vibe with me inside... in places and ways i cannot even partially express with words... only FEEL them as sensations... in my mind, body and soul. sincerely... and simply.

it is an honour to be welcomed into a culture that is not the same that i physically encapsulate... but do... at the exact same time.

and so i give thanks... and relish in the connection of i n i...

it fulfills my soul, and gives me energy... to recycle, and give back out to others, as they give to me.

i feel it...

in my roots...

STRETCHED... b/w high-ness & grounded-ness.

a place i am learning well.

we all take things, drink things, do things... to feel better.

to feel healthy, whole, better, more energized, more calm.

some are prescribed, some are socially acceptable.

some are legal, some are illegal.

some are potent, some are softer, slower... more subtle.

some are sensitive, some have side effects.

this can be coffee, it can be sugar, or chocolate... it can be herbal, medicinal plants from pachamama... in the form of tea from my garden, or magic mushrooms from a field.

they may be a pill to be taken a few times daily from my doctor, or a capsule i bought from a trusted friend at a electronic music festival in the forest.

it may be me going to the cafe by myself, or to the land with my ancestors....

we are all human beings in this earth. on this earth. with this earth...

with each other.


i give thanks for life i have been given...

i give thanks for the pleasing and healing possibilities passed onto us by all that is creation.

and i do not, and will not judge others for what they choose to do while navigating through this course of life.

we all make choices to enhance, support, heal, calm, play with our conscious and unconscious existences... and we need to recognize that we are ALL choosing differently, but choosing nonetheless.

...

sometimes i feel stretched... as i am high... yet still grounded.

i am high in my consciousness, yet rooted in the earth. and i feel lengthened... stretched above to below... below to above.

i reach up... high to the sky...

in balance, always.


I am in balance.

because my faith and my groundedness is in pachamama...

mother universe earth creation. and all her inclusive cycles... life and death.

STRETCHED in between.

Righteousness.

It is what i am aiming to live my life with... it is what i am always reminding myself to BE.

I am who i am. I do what i do.

And while some people may not exactly understand it... i can assure you, it is always done in a way that is righteous. Or consciously intended.


Sometimes i catch myself being a human... a creature who has been socialized by the values of the society in which i was raised, we all have been.

And i catch myself thinking or doing those lessons that this society and culture and all that has influenced me have taught me...

And sometimes another essence of me sort of whispers in...’wait a second... that’s not right.’

Its not right to violate people. Its not right to harm others. Its not right to consciously live in dishonesty.

It is right to look to my brothers and sisters with eyes of truth, and caring, and respect.


Sometimes when i come across people, or figures in society who carry some kind of weight, where their role is SUPPOSED to be deserving of respect... such as those in positions of power and authority... like a police officer, or a boss, or a government ELECTED official... and they are not living RIGHTEOUSLY... i feel frustrated. And i don’t want to be, i never want to be frustrated, or angry... i completely believe in being peaceful.

Being peaceful is at my truest core nature... because this earth is so perfect and beautiful... and so is all of our natural roots connectedness. And i find such beauty in it all... that i know the earth and all of us living beings within it are meant to be peaceful, and in true harmony and balance with eachother. That is the utmost beauty of life and death. These cycles and separate species and dynamics all fit together into one beautiful perfection.

Underlying all of this is respect... and acceptance. That we ALL are one. That we ALL are part of eachother.

I believe this so absolutely completely.

And we are harming the earth. And there are people who have the power, who violate that power, because they are not doing anything about it. And they are playing games with so many people, and exploiting them... with their dishonesty.

And all i want to do with my human life is live righteously... with respect, and honesty, and peacefulness, and joy... with those around me, those who live on the same land and earth as i do... and like the old camping rule... leave it better then when i came into it...

And you know what... i simply cannot stand by when i see another harming another... i cannot see it and just turn and walk away... i do not believe in that. That is not taking care of my fellow human beings, and that is not taking care of the earth.


So if the police are out there in my community and they are wondering what my story is... this is it.

Simple truths, for real.

So let us righteously come together as human beings, and find our righteous balance.

Peace.

Chai

In India it simply means tea.

Tea that you share with all those around.
Neighbours, friends, brothers, sisters.

Chai that you buy for the cutie sneaky kids on the street.

Chai that you sit with- and look over the Ganga water in Varanasi- sipping out of a mini-terracotta cup- that you can smash on the ground after so it falls apart back to the earth. It's a whole experience that is wonderfully so satisfying.

Chai that i brew on my stove-top pot at home now in Canada... for all my babied- or pregnant sisters.
To Share our experiences over, with and through.

Chai that steep-ens over a day or two, with its cinnamon and ginger, cardamom and cloves... plus almond milk to soften and hold the flavours.

Their truest most richest flavours coming together in delicious synergy... to warm us and our insides during these cold winter days.

I make a whole big pot on purpose- knowing it will be shared for the next days. Not knowing all the reasons yet.

Wednesday the Mama's gather.

Thursday i go to dinner at a lovely friends, and i bring her some tea.

Friday- a long lost rainbow brother comes back into town- and we fill in the blanks over chai.

Saturday- a respected elder comes over to simply BE with me... a time so absolutely meaningful comforting and guiding... as my friend just died in Chile the night before. I am in shock. I needed to be comforted and warmed... we shared and talked over chai.

Sunday- last jar of chai... strong, dark and rich. It was needed. I sat with my sister- it was her best friend who died. We needed to just sit... and reminisce... Remember who he was- who he is.

He always added joy, warmth, and comfort.

Chai, tea... its more then the physical form.

It was brewing as i sat with my Mama Sisters... brewing as they brew new life in their bellies, or strengthened the child who fed at their breast... with loving spice.

Chai- it's loving energy being transmitted from mouth to mouth, belly to belly... heart to heart.

I sneakily know the story- namely THIS one... of the connection that this particular brew made.. easing the flow of life and death with the comfort it brought... the conversations and stories and emotions that its heat and warmth and spicy love nurtured, evoked and comforted.

Holding it- warming our hands... pleasuring our senses... and giving us a reason and focal point to connect.

Chai.